Dear Mr. Senator,
I understand that it is very important to get your face on Television and be noticed. I know it is very important for politicians to appear concerned about the problems with this country. I also know that worrying about a silly little game called football and wasting my hard earned money to research this whole "Spy Gate" thing is ridiculous.
I think the American people are worried about three things right now. Read along and maybe you can stop wasting my precious Sportscenter time and precious money Mr. Senator. First, I hate paying three dollars per gallon at the pump. Instead of looking at NFL game film all day, maybe you should try to create some sort of relief for the little people who don't have a car service for hire and have to drive themselves to work every day.
How about we let the league handle this situation? I think someone at my job signed out of work early three years ago. Can we waste money to research that? It's a really pressing issue with me and could affect the integrity of my job. See what I'm talking about? See how silly that sounds?